Quick.

How many Walmart employees does it take to find out if they have marshmellows in stock?

NONE!

I went shopping for household items today. Went to Walmart for 4 laundry baskets, deoderant, shampoo and tried to find marshmellows. Couldn't find any so I grabbed about 4 Walmart employees to see if they carried marshmellows. Did any one of them get back to me? No. I took my rice crispies cereal and threw it on some random shelf and paid for the rest of my things. I hate those fuckers.

I also cleaned my apartment. First the kitchen. See, Sean went and bought us a portable dishwasher (I'm very excited). I cleaned the stove, the microwave, wet swiffered the floor. I cleaned up all the dirty dishes that had been laying around for a month. Next I hit the bathroom. I hate cleaning bathrooms. I wear a surgical mask plus gloves when I do. Next chore, living room. That was pretty easy. Then I cleaned the turtle's tanks. Chripes, I HATE cleaning the tanks. At least I only have to do it twice a month and the turts look so happy after they get fresh clean water. Dining room was next on the list. Easy chore. I'm gonna work on our bedroom and my office tomorrow.

I was also in a gardening mood. I went to the local garden shop and picked out a hanging basked fully bloomed with yellow daises and also picked up a couple of impatientes. Went home, started to plant when I notice the dog across the street starts heading towards me. I didn't know I could run that fast. It was probably a friendly dog but I didn't wanna take any chances. I already have a varicose vein on my leg, I don't need any other damaging scars. I coulda taken my shovel and smashed it over it's head but my legs did the talking.

Chripes I've got so much work to do. I'm afraid of Monday.

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Catherine and I have decided that when we both turn thirty we will be cutting our hair short. 'Course I am a year older so she'll be relieved to not have to do it if my hair looks all jacked up. I've telephoned her every night since Sean's been away. We stay on the phone until one of us gets tired, usually it's her. I'm glad I have her in my life, she's one of the beings in my world that keeps me balanced. I don't have to pacify her, or feel like I'm losing out in the friendship. It's one of those relationships where 'what you see is what you get.'
I am looking forward to seeing her in late June. Good times, people. Good times.

I'm excited that Sean's coming back tomorrow. Well, today, actually. I know he needed to take this trip to see his friends in Florida. He's going through some stressful times. I'm going to try my best to shield him from other insignificant stressors.

Geez, you don't realize how much you miss your guy until you look under the couch and find an empty beer bottle (or two) and and say, "I'm gonna kick his ass" but you realize he's thousands of miles away, so you can't.

I unlock the front door, walk into my apartment, throw my keys and bag on the floor. Once I get past the sun porch I start stripping. First my bottoms, then my top. I leave a trail of Emma Wear as I head down to the bathroom where I proceed to wash my hands. I look in the mirror at my half naked self and think,'tomorrow is a new day.'

Then, it's nap time. It's like clockwork. I get home from work exhausted, I nap, then wake up at exactly 8 PM.

Sean is not here. He's in America's Wang. I've been laying low, I miss the S.O.B. He left me a couple surpises. The first one was he put the A.C into our bedroom window. Second one was he did a load of dishes in our new portable dishwasher.

I think I'll spend my alone time cleaning the house. I'll be turning my energy meter on full blast because you should see this apartment. It's a M-E-S-S.

It's SO HOT.

This morning, I slept through my alarm. I was having a dream that I was at this store and everytime someone walked through the doors the alarm sensors would go off. It seemed like everyone and their mothers were going through the door and each one that went through the alarm would go off. I got so annoyed at the beeping that I went up to the detector and unplugged it and the damn thing still kept beeping.

I got frantic and covered my ears but the beeping got louder and louder and louder.

Then I woke up.

My alarm had been going off for almost an hour. I decided to call into work to let them know I'd be twenty to thirty minutes late. I then layed in bed and watched the Croc Hunter try to communicate with a gorilla.

I bought a suit. It's not just any 'ole suit. It's the suit of all suits that I now own. It's my springy/summer suit. And I am feelin' very bad ass right now.

I've been on a rampage looking for a particular suit to wear to a conference this Wednesday. It absolutely HAD to be lightweight, it HAD to be a springy/summerish color and I HAD to be in love with it to be spending so much money on it. Had no luck on Saturday when I went on my suit hunt and bribed Sean to come with, then today, after trying on seven (7) suits, then giving up, there it was. It was like the rack had a halo glowing over it.

I am so fucking thrilled.

A $500.00 suit on sale for...get this...$126.00...I was expecting to pay more but that $126.00 still is a shit load of money to me but I am going to wear this over and over, and make love to it, caress it. It's so pretty!!

My hair was matted to my head from the humidity. I felt disgusting like I just swam in a pool of oil. I had a nice woman waiting on me and felt bad that she was pulling off any and all petite size off the rack (none fit right) come to find I found this suit all by myself.

Okay, enough about the suit.

While I was trying on the many suits in the dressing room, I was disgusted at the sight of myself in the three way mirror. I KNOW I am a thin person but even thin people have to work out. First off, I have bruises on my legs. I felt like I was looking at Courtney Love's legs. Second, I have friggen cellulite. Third, I need to tone my ass and my legs up. HOW COULD I EVEN HAVE THOUGHT TO GO TO THE BEACH LAST SUNDAY AFTERNOON...THANK THE LORD FOR THREE WAY MIRRORS. I spent 30 minutes on the treadmill a while ago. I'm probably gonna go back on it after this.

I'm a little peeved right now. They replaced my 11 PM show with Who's the Boss?

I guess I'll have to start going to bed at 11.