I'm taking suggestions on what I should do to my neighbor who shoveled the snow from the back of their cars to the back of MY car.
Mare wants me to pour water on all of their vehicles and let it freeze over. Can't, too many witnesses. I need something more covert.

I'm just gonna pour rock salt on my sidewalk and behind my car and they can go fuck themselves.

The wind and snow kicked my ass. I hurt my back, too. Remember, lift with your legs and not your back.

It's 6:40 A.M and I haven't slept since my last post. I think I'm hallucinating because I still see snow falling heavily outside and it isn't just fluttering it seems as though it's pounding to the ground. Can this be? Cause I feel sorry for any person that has to be out in this weather. I will probably fall asleep soon then wake up after a couple hours and be crabby for the rest of the day. Thank goodness I'll be stranded by myself in this house.

I've been camped out in the livingroom. It's nice because I sleep with the Christmas lights on. It sorta acts as a night light for me.
My back hurts though, we need a new futon mattress.

I am gonna try to sleep now.

It's snowing heavily. I've opened the blinds so I can watch the snow fall. I can see the flakes so clearly. The street lights have illuminated each and every flake.
I wish Sean was here so we could enjoy the snow together but, this is nice too. I'm alone in a nice warm house, I've got plenty of food, cable, and fabric to sew with no t.v blaring in another room :)
Sean and I don't usually watch the same shows. I watch the news a lot. He watches sitcoms. Right now, I'm watching the Color Purple. It's one of my favorite movies. Come to think of it...I SHOULD HAVE RECORDED THIS! Damn.
Earlier, Sling Blade was on, it's one of my favorite movies, too.

Well, I'm gonna start on some sewing projects now.

So ever since the DVD player came out, I have refused to use a VHS player, until now.
I've learned how to record shows that I don't wanna miss on Seans VHS in the living room. Let me tell you, I cannot stop recording. It's the coolest thing. (I know, I'm a dweeb) Like yesterday, I taped Survivor because I wanted to do some shopping, I came back and found out the VHS has an option to get rid of all the commercials so I watched Survivor straight through and it was awesome.
I also find it convenient to have a VHS especially when all the good movies are rented out on DVD's but the VHS tapes are left.

We're gonna have a snow storm here in New England this weekend. It's suppose to start tonight. Geez, I don't like snow.

What would you call a person who went off to Xmas Shop for other people but ended up getting something for herself?

Quick, call me a bad name. Make me feel bad!

I don't know why I ALWAYS do that EVERY Xmas.

I had to leave the store because I noticed it was snowing and I didn't wanna drive in icy conditions. Good thing though cause I was on my way to another shopping mall. I bet it was a sign.

And the world turns, regardless if I sit on my fat ass doing not one damn thing.

Sean has left for the birthday present he has given himself. I dropped him off at the bus station with a minute to spare. My car is fabulous. Especially driving through speed bumps. Going 50 mph. Yelling at the driver with the big S.U.V, "Speed it up, pig fucker.

With a minute to spare.

As I sit here drinking my coffee spiked with Bailey's, I feel so alone.

Man, I miss him. It's odd. He usually makes me nuts.
I went to the supermarket and came back to an empty house. But a clean house no less. As soon as I got back from dropping Sean off, I cleaned like I've never cleaned before. I EVEN CLEANED THE TOILET, which is the worst chore in the world. Whenever I need to think, or not think about life, I clean.

On the agenda for the next few days, I will be making apple pie, an Arts and Crafts surprise for Elzilla, more cleaning, more job searching, hopefully some Christmas shopping (I haven't even started yet- eek!), I hear it's gonna snow so I've made sure to stock the house with food and stuff to do.

By the way...

If any of you are around me, and hear me start any of my sentences with, "I go" or, "I says", you seriously need to hurt me. I've been doing that a lot lately. I'm sure people are annoyed with me when I talk like that, I know it's annoying the hell outta me.

Happy Birthday to my dad! He turns 55.
I have a 55 y.o dad.

Memories, in the corner of my mind...

When I think of my father, I think of a person who used to scare me. He was a very strict dad, I don't think I had a relationship with him like what my friends have with their fathers.
I remember when we lived in Hawaii, we had gone to a pet store where they had exotic pets. There was a pretty parrot in a cage and I walked up to it and tried to get it to talk. Well, my dad says, "Stick your finger in the cage", so I did and the damn thing bit me. My dad laughed and said, "see, that's what you get." In my mind I thought, "You told me to do it, stupid." 'Course, I couldn't say it to his face.
He'd take us on fishing trips that we dreaded because he'd yell at us for any little thing we did. We had to do chores at a very young age, I remember having to make my bed and fold our laundry the way the Navy taught him.
Once, in the Philippines, while getting out of the car, my grandpa's guard dogs were growling and barking at all of us. My brother and sister made it out, but I sat there in the car refusing to get out because of the dogs. My dad grabs me by the hair and drags me out, dogs growling right next to my face and jumping on me. See, a normal dad would have picked his kid up and carried her to safety. But no, not my dad. I think that's why dogs scare me. Gee, I have so many memories of him, most of them sad.

Well, anyway, Happy Birthday to my dad...I tried calling but no one's home.

Hypoglycemia.

Symptoms:

Mild Hypoglycemia
Sudden hunger**
Dizziness**
Shakiness**
Nervousness*
Pounding heartbeat*
Drowsiness**
Sweating*
Numbness or tingling around mouth and lips*
Tiredness**

Moderate Hypoglycemia
Personality change
Irritability**
Headache**
Blurred vision*
Confusion and/or difficulty concentrating*
Poor coordination
Slurred or slow speech*

I think I might have Mild, if not Moderate Hypoglycemia.
Diabetes does run in my family on my fathers side. My father was diagnosed a few years ago.
I've experienced both mild and the moderate symptoms. I put an asterisk near the symptoms that occur most. What's scary is, I had an episode Saturday night. I remember feeling like this in the past, but it had not happened in a while.
I may have to fly home to see my aunt who's a doctor as I do not have insurance.