Let the weekend begin!!

Had dinner at Siam Lotus. Very delicious.

Watched new favorite show, The Apprentice. I very much dislike Ereka. Favorite person so far, Amaroso.

Can someone tell me why Sam is still on that show?

So, as I sit in bed, I have come up with more ways of organizing myself at work. I'm wondering if my supervisor thinks I'm a dumbass. I've been at work for one week now but it feels like I've been there for ages. I feel like things are falling into place, now. At least, I hope they are.

HAWAFENA...take me away!


I had a bad, bad day today. I'm not shittin' you. I felt like all eyes were on me as I typed a report. I couldn't help it. It was a LONG ass report. I started it at 9 A.M and finished at 3. It had to be looked over for corrections which took an hour or so to get back, then I had to correct whatever mistakes I made which took another half hour and it had to be FedEx'ed before 6:30 P.M. I ran to the FedEx box at 5:30 P.M and dropped it off. Next thing I know the FedEx truck started driving up the hill. Gawd damn. You know, if I would have missed that pick up, I would have had to drive up to the location of the Superior Court where it was due.

I followed the checklist I had created the day before and did everything okay. I find it hard to really follow along and understand my position when my supervisor keeps holding my hand and not giving me a little more room to do my own thing. I asked her how she thought I was doing. She said, "You are about the same way I was when I first started. Don't worry about it." Sigh.

Balance.

Can someone tell me how to leave work @ work? I mean, for real! I come home and I worry. Yes it might be because this is a new job that is much more challenging (much, much more) but really, I need to create a balance. I've worked there for almost a week now and still feel like I don't know what I'm doing and my brain has turned to mush.

I've had a couple nightmares, too. I cried in the shower. I haven't been able to make concrete plans with friends because I'm too tired and stressed from work. I find the only moment I really enjoy out of my day is when I take a shower in the mornings. I bought Herbel Essence Hawafena Shampoo and Conditioner, and when I lather my hair, it feels as if the suds are massaging my scalp. You should try it.

I am in dire need of a massage. Tomorrow, I'm actually afraid to go into work.

My favorite underwears have holes in them.

Will someone do something about this fucking cold? I'm starting to get crocodile skin.

I'm very tired. As I was saying, on Tuesdays I'll have to go to the D.O.C from 8 to 3. Today was my very first field trip there. It was, eerie. (I'll write something about this experience when I feel like it)

Anyway, I get back to the office at 4. I really didn't have to go back to the office but I wanted to catch up on work so I ended up staying there 'till 5:45. Then, I went home, welcomed a hug from Sean, changed into Pj's and had some Darjeeling tea. I took a nap, at least I think I did.

At the end of the month, I think I'm going to go to a weekend spa and get massaged or visit Chicago. I dunno.

I have Monday off. Yippee!

Me: GIRL! I have Martin Luther King Jr. day off! I can't wait!!!

Catherine: (uncontrollable laughter) What, a year wasn't enough?

Me: (Hangs up the phone :::: Calls Catherine back)

Catherine: (more uncontrollable laughter)

Me: Shut the fuck up.


Yes, I'm very excited to have a three day weekend. Is that so wrong? I KNOW I wasn't working for a year and two months but still! I've been working my ass off the past five days. Also, the past jobs I've had, we never had MLK day, off. The sucky part is the day after, I'll be going to the D.O.C.

Had a long day at work, although with what I have to do, it seems I do not have enough time in the day to do it. I don't dare look at the clock. I have found myself staying late with each passing day. I'm fine with it, though.
For those of you who know me, you know that I do not like to follow directions. I cringe at the sight of directions, and if you look closely, you might see smoke coming from my ears. I had received an outline of what my job description entails the day I started and I almost vomitted. Well, tonight I have devised my own outline, my own checklist which I HOPE will help me.

So tomorrow will be the piece de resistance . I will be heading to the D.O.C at 7:30 A.M with my supervisor. I'm kinda excited, scared, nervous. I'm sure I'll have to take an imodium before I leave the house. F.Y.I, I will be at the D.O.C every Tuesday...exciting. Mare, you work in a prison. Give me some pointers on how to be butch-like. :P

Tonight, I had a very nice dinner with Kay and Johnny and Sean. K & J came bearing gifts brought from London and Ireland. Some Darjeeling tea from Harrods - I've never had it but it smells delicious and an Irish name plate with "Emma" on it from Ireland.
At dinner we all took turns giving a speech on what was new in our lives, it's quite funny but one of those things you have to witness in person.
Ew, and for an appetizer, I had wanted to try Oysters. It was so nasty. I almost vomited. I ended up not finishing my dinner because I couldn't forget the icky taste. Why the frig do people eat them as an aphrodisiac?

I envisioned myself dancing the night away to celebrate friends, and my new job. It didn't come to pass.
When I wrote in an earlier post that this job was going to be very different than past the job responsibilities I've had, I wasn't kidding. Reality hit me on Friday as I was doing some of the more stressful tasks. I was presented with a project to have ready by Tuesday, and it is almost ready. I'll be finishing things up tomorrow.
But anyhow, I let my emotions get the best of me last Friday and let sorrow and exhaustion cancel any plans that required human contact. For your sake, and mine, it's better that way. When I am low in spirit, I choose to be alone. I feel like an asshole to not have even attempted to go out but, I needed some space.

I had a weird dream that stuck to my brain:

I was walking in a nice looking neighborhood late at night with Sean, John - my friend El's boyfriend. Apparently we had left a raging party and Sean and John were very drunk. John was so drunk he passed out in someone's yard. Sean and I sat there with him and discussed how we were going to get home. Then Sean notices a sign that says the property was equipped with an alarm...and a big ass sign that said, "NO TRESPASSERS"...
I figured it was okay to just sit there in the yard when all of a sudden we hear an alarm go off. We did all we could to try and wake John up, even tried to carry him but gave up on trying and left him laying in the grass.
So Sean and I ran off and walked until we saw a Club. We tried to get in but there were so many people there and you had to be on a guest list. As we were about to give up, Britney Spears walks up to me and grabs my hand and walks us into the Club. She smiles at me and walks off.

Is that fucking weird or what?